Inspiration!
I'm working on a pair of arm warmers for E, and I'm sitting here swearing at the yarn and being disgruntled. One of my favorite authors, Lynn Flewelling, is also a knitter and has compared writing the first few chapters of a new book to knitting a pair of socks (or anything in the round). The first few rows/chapters are always the hardest, and this is proving true.
See, I'm using a larger circular needle to join the first row of stitches together to begin the tube. But the beginning is never easy. One needs to get the right number of stitches, arrange them on the needles, and then sort it all out so that the stitches don't twist and end up turning into a mobius. This is infinitely more irritating with a larger number of stitches, because you can go a few rows before realizing that what you set out to make is now twisted and needs to be ripped out (when that is over 200 stitches, the desire to throw the yarn, needles, and anything close by across the room is very, very high).
Also the first few rows are just tedious. You're waiting for the pattern to appear, but you need to set everything up, so when the pattern does appear, it is where it is supposed to be. A missing stitch can be frustrating, but not so hard to fix as a twist. But there are are other things to deal with. When knitting in the round, whether it be on dpns (double pointed needles - very popular for small projects), two circular needles, or one longer circular needle, there are places where you end your rows and move things so you can start the stitches on the next needle. Often there are gaps between the needles, because getting the tension just right is a constant battle for each knitter. These gaps can be negated, for the most part, when the item is finished, soaked, and then blocked (blocking is stretching the fabric out to it's full potential and shows stitch definition and the pattern in its full glory), but they are frustrating while you are knitting.
Thankfully arm warmers don't have a heal to turn, but I've decided to make them just a bit more difficult by adding a partial thumb, rather than just leaving an opening for the thumb. I'm doing research on how to do this and think I have a plan, but I still have a ways to go before I need to worry about it, as I only just cast on the beginning stitches.
Each knit item has a story to tell. The hours that the knitter put into creating a piece, whether perfect, holey, three armed, or too small, it is an effort of love. Even if the item is something that knitter just happened to make and for some reason you fell in love with (or was gifted!), it was an act of love. The finished product has probably been sworn at, petted lovingly, tossed in a corner, visited numerous places (especially coffee shops!), and been bathed in wool wash. It has been in her hands for hours and those hands made a skein of yarn and two (or more) needles work in a beautiful harmony to create something simple, amazing, and precious.
(Written at the end of August)
Monday, October 3, 2011
I was never good with titles
I haven't posted in awhile and that's about to change.
My beloved E has challenged me to write 2000 words a day, anything I want, to get me writing. I figure I can at least use some of those words to update here a little more often, right? I'm also gearing up for Nanowrimo, which I'm hoping I can actually complete this year. If I'm already used to writing 2000 words each day, it should be a piece of cake. Here's hoping that thought is right!
Sword class continues. Difficulty still continues. The light bulb above my head shines dimly at moments, flares brightly, and then fades slightly. I understand the basic cuts, getting better a the drawing/cutting moves, and still only feel comfortable with one kata. Sensei told me that my basic cuts are looking more solid. He had one of his black belts work with me on two forms that I really needed help with (the man is so kind and very willing to offer advice, working with me challenged him to think a little differently). The foot work on one still confuses me, no matter how many times I do it on my own, whether on two feet or in my head, I can't seem to get the directions right. There's something missing part way through that eludes me. I'll get it figured out though, hopefully I'll ask the right questions. The other form he worked with me on has more of a hand/arm movement issue than a footwork issue. I have to remember to push forward with my left hand for the cut to work correctly (it's a side cut), but then I inevitably forget something else. It's a bit frustrating, but I'll continue trying, because it will sink in eventually.
Bringing up a different thought, piano was never like this. Yeah, practice is important, but I was rarely expected to remember how things went, I had sheet music. The path was laid out for me, I just needed to follow the notes. I realize that not everything in life will be laid out for me so well, and that I need to learn to break things down into pieces to help me remember. I do long for written instructions though.
I have to say, I really enjoy learning sword still. I love the feeling of those rare times I get it right. When I suddenly understand why one movement flows into another. Getting foot work done is a wonderful victory each time, and being able to keep up in drills feels like flying. I know it's taking longer for me to get it, but I'm okay with that.
On the knitting front, I had a dry spell recently. I have found some lovely yarns to work with, but no patterns have been calling me to make them. I've been working on something for my dear Jen's birthday (it's late, neither of us are worried - at least I hope not!), and need to get that sent off in the near future. I've done two shawls (Laodice and Eiki) this summer that have proven to me that my knitting has, in fact, sped up. That feels great, because it means that I'll feel a little bit less stressed about Xmas gifts. I'm still working on making up my mind if I like making socks or not. The tiny needles and the tiny yarn get tedious after a bit and I find myself getting frustrated far too easily with them.
Yeah, Christmas has been on my mind. It's amazing how I'll look at yarn and slowly start seeing potential pieces, and colors that go with people. It's frustrating when I see a pattern that I think might be perfect for someone, but I don't know what color would be best for them. I understand now what my friend, Melissa, meant when she asked me if I'd use a handmade quilted item. There is a lot of time and love put into a handmade piece, so picking the wrong color (pattern, or person) can mean it just gets stuck at the back of the closet, or in a bin with moth blocks, or worse, in the garage with the tools! I have, however, located yarn for both of my older nieces and should be able to find a proper pattern for both of them. A's is fun and colorful, while K's yarn is appropriately dark for my little goth teen.
On a different note, I've had people urging me to make baby gifts. I fear tiny items, because I know they will only have a limited use. Now small blankets, wash clothes, things of that nature, I can understand and get behind. But the tiny hand knitted sweaters (no matter how adorable they may be) that might fit the baby for a month or more seem sweet, but frivolous. These are on my mind, as I have a friend who just recently announced her second pregnancy (I get to be an aunt again! I hope this one is a boy, because I'm woefully short on nephews, as much as I love my three nieces). I want to make something for them, because well, I haven't done any baby items yet.
The weather here in CA has finally decided to cool down, and the clouds have finally rolled in. Whenever people ask me about the weather here, all I can say is, "It's nice." It is always nice, even on the hottest days, because there is no humidity. But today we're supposed to get some rain, and then on Wednesday more. The temperature has dropped to the 60's, which is probably driving a good number of the locals mad. I expect to see people in heavy sweaters and parkas soon.
Along with the lovely weather, Lambtown took place in Dixon, Ca this last weekend. I'll admit, I was underwhelmed by the size of it. Having been to the Maryland Sheep & Wool festival and Stitches West made me expect something bigger and more exciting. It was nice though, don't get me wrong. I wish they had had a little more variety on the food front, because while the idea of gyros, lamb ribs, and lamb tacos are nice, it just wasn't enough (we had heard something about lamb burgers, but never found them). The sales booths were nice, offering a fairly good selection of handspun yarns, hand knitted pieces, and loads of patterns. I had a budget, which I stayed nicely in, selecting only a skein of yarn and a pattern to go with it. This will be a project that I'll be putting together soon (the yarn is a lovely mix of rose garden colors with a coppery thread throughout). E also picked out a pattern for me to do, and the lady there showed me a trick for purling that I can't for the life of me remember (I am so not a visual learner).
There were plenty of sheep to be seen, as well as a few alpaca and llamas. I got to witness a woman standing next to a alpaca and the alpaca loving on her, nuzzling at her neck while she petted it. I've never seen anyone actually interacting with one of these animals like that, so it was a new and pleasing experience. She was in the petting zoo area, that also had a pygmy goat, ducks, chickens, a calf, kittens, piglets, and a couple of bunnies. I really wanted to take the pygmy goat home with me!
So the future holds more sword classes, hopefully more chances to fondle yarn, and Stitches West (and possibly Galifrey One) in February, and then Jen's wedding in March. The next six months are going to be fun with bridesmaid dress shopping, holidays coming up, and numerous conventions - where I will hopefully get to hang out with friends. I'm really looking forward to the rainy season and the hills around our town turning from their slumbering brown to a lush green, and telling all the flowering plants what month it is and how they are not supposed to be blooming in the winter. :)
My beloved E has challenged me to write 2000 words a day, anything I want, to get me writing. I figure I can at least use some of those words to update here a little more often, right? I'm also gearing up for Nanowrimo, which I'm hoping I can actually complete this year. If I'm already used to writing 2000 words each day, it should be a piece of cake. Here's hoping that thought is right!
Sword class continues. Difficulty still continues. The light bulb above my head shines dimly at moments, flares brightly, and then fades slightly. I understand the basic cuts, getting better a the drawing/cutting moves, and still only feel comfortable with one kata. Sensei told me that my basic cuts are looking more solid. He had one of his black belts work with me on two forms that I really needed help with (the man is so kind and very willing to offer advice, working with me challenged him to think a little differently). The foot work on one still confuses me, no matter how many times I do it on my own, whether on two feet or in my head, I can't seem to get the directions right. There's something missing part way through that eludes me. I'll get it figured out though, hopefully I'll ask the right questions. The other form he worked with me on has more of a hand/arm movement issue than a footwork issue. I have to remember to push forward with my left hand for the cut to work correctly (it's a side cut), but then I inevitably forget something else. It's a bit frustrating, but I'll continue trying, because it will sink in eventually.
Bringing up a different thought, piano was never like this. Yeah, practice is important, but I was rarely expected to remember how things went, I had sheet music. The path was laid out for me, I just needed to follow the notes. I realize that not everything in life will be laid out for me so well, and that I need to learn to break things down into pieces to help me remember. I do long for written instructions though.
I have to say, I really enjoy learning sword still. I love the feeling of those rare times I get it right. When I suddenly understand why one movement flows into another. Getting foot work done is a wonderful victory each time, and being able to keep up in drills feels like flying. I know it's taking longer for me to get it, but I'm okay with that.
On the knitting front, I had a dry spell recently. I have found some lovely yarns to work with, but no patterns have been calling me to make them. I've been working on something for my dear Jen's birthday (it's late, neither of us are worried - at least I hope not!), and need to get that sent off in the near future. I've done two shawls (Laodice and Eiki) this summer that have proven to me that my knitting has, in fact, sped up. That feels great, because it means that I'll feel a little bit less stressed about Xmas gifts. I'm still working on making up my mind if I like making socks or not. The tiny needles and the tiny yarn get tedious after a bit and I find myself getting frustrated far too easily with them.
Yeah, Christmas has been on my mind. It's amazing how I'll look at yarn and slowly start seeing potential pieces, and colors that go with people. It's frustrating when I see a pattern that I think might be perfect for someone, but I don't know what color would be best for them. I understand now what my friend, Melissa, meant when she asked me if I'd use a handmade quilted item. There is a lot of time and love put into a handmade piece, so picking the wrong color (pattern, or person) can mean it just gets stuck at the back of the closet, or in a bin with moth blocks, or worse, in the garage with the tools! I have, however, located yarn for both of my older nieces and should be able to find a proper pattern for both of them. A's is fun and colorful, while K's yarn is appropriately dark for my little goth teen.
On a different note, I've had people urging me to make baby gifts. I fear tiny items, because I know they will only have a limited use. Now small blankets, wash clothes, things of that nature, I can understand and get behind. But the tiny hand knitted sweaters (no matter how adorable they may be) that might fit the baby for a month or more seem sweet, but frivolous. These are on my mind, as I have a friend who just recently announced her second pregnancy (I get to be an aunt again! I hope this one is a boy, because I'm woefully short on nephews, as much as I love my three nieces). I want to make something for them, because well, I haven't done any baby items yet.
The weather here in CA has finally decided to cool down, and the clouds have finally rolled in. Whenever people ask me about the weather here, all I can say is, "It's nice." It is always nice, even on the hottest days, because there is no humidity. But today we're supposed to get some rain, and then on Wednesday more. The temperature has dropped to the 60's, which is probably driving a good number of the locals mad. I expect to see people in heavy sweaters and parkas soon.
Along with the lovely weather, Lambtown took place in Dixon, Ca this last weekend. I'll admit, I was underwhelmed by the size of it. Having been to the Maryland Sheep & Wool festival and Stitches West made me expect something bigger and more exciting. It was nice though, don't get me wrong. I wish they had had a little more variety on the food front, because while the idea of gyros, lamb ribs, and lamb tacos are nice, it just wasn't enough (we had heard something about lamb burgers, but never found them). The sales booths were nice, offering a fairly good selection of handspun yarns, hand knitted pieces, and loads of patterns. I had a budget, which I stayed nicely in, selecting only a skein of yarn and a pattern to go with it. This will be a project that I'll be putting together soon (the yarn is a lovely mix of rose garden colors with a coppery thread throughout). E also picked out a pattern for me to do, and the lady there showed me a trick for purling that I can't for the life of me remember (I am so not a visual learner).
There were plenty of sheep to be seen, as well as a few alpaca and llamas. I got to witness a woman standing next to a alpaca and the alpaca loving on her, nuzzling at her neck while she petted it. I've never seen anyone actually interacting with one of these animals like that, so it was a new and pleasing experience. She was in the petting zoo area, that also had a pygmy goat, ducks, chickens, a calf, kittens, piglets, and a couple of bunnies. I really wanted to take the pygmy goat home with me!
So the future holds more sword classes, hopefully more chances to fondle yarn, and Stitches West (and possibly Galifrey One) in February, and then Jen's wedding in March. The next six months are going to be fun with bridesmaid dress shopping, holidays coming up, and numerous conventions - where I will hopefully get to hang out with friends. I'm really looking forward to the rainy season and the hills around our town turning from their slumbering brown to a lush green, and telling all the flowering plants what month it is and how they are not supposed to be blooming in the winter. :)
Friday, May 13, 2011
The path opens
I realize that I started this blog and have only made two posts, and I intend to resolve this problem. I want to at least update weekly, if not more often than that. I also need to start uploading pictures of the knitting at the very least.
I'm getting in more sword classes than aikido. I'm not really complaining about this, as sword makes me aware of my balance/center and that feels really good. I'm learning how to center myself, which I'm noticing makes me a lot less wobbly. This is good, because my equilibrium isn't the best, so balance has always been an issue.
Since I've gone to a few classes and practice here at home (not as often as I should, I admit, another thing I need to work on), I've noticed a few other things. I have to teach myself to relax my shoulders and keep my elbows in. I don't know why my elbows want to stick out and I want to hunch my shoulders. Then I have to learn to flow more with the sword. I need to learn how to extend my arms without over reaching. I need to learn to shuffle better, but that's coming more easily. I find myself working more on my footwork than anything else. I practice that at random times in the house. I haven't done it much while in public, but I suspect that will change with time.
On the knitting front, I've been avoiding things I shouldn't be and doing other things. I completed a 198 yards of heaven shawl - made of out of Caron Spa and it was closer to 300 yards. It knit up fast, but came out a bit smaller than I had wanted, but is fantastically soft.
When I finished that I was agonizing over what I would do next. I found a shawl that I wanted to do on Ravelry and bought the pattern, then realized that I could not find my 5's. Irritated, I realized I would have to wait until next payday to get a set. I decided to make a knit picks order, but didn't want to not doing anything in the time that I need to wait to make the order, so I looked at shawls I could make with my stash and current needles. I found another shawl that I wanted to do, that also needed 5's. Finally I looked at a pattern that I had decided a couple years ago I wasn't skilled enough to do.
Haruni scared me when I first saw it. It was a lot of lace and a strange cast off. I decided, because I didn't like how the pattern looked, that I would not be doing it. Well, I looked at it again at the end of April and decided it was time to do it. I cast it on, size 4's and Malabrigo Caribeano sock yarn. I also used some blue 6/0 beads on the leaves. I studied this pattern. I went through a bunch of other people's projects, looking at what they did, what they had in their project notes, their suggestions, opinions. I went back a couple of times and looked over a few again, when deciding where I wanted to put the beads. I decided when I did bead it that trying to put the beads on the right side row was royally messing up my tension, so after two rows of beads, I started beading on the wrong side before I purled the stitch. This worked a lot better, my tension was no longer suffering. I'm almost at the end, where I'm still not certain if I'm going to do the crochet bind off or the knitting bind off. If I do the knit, I'm going to drop my needle size down to a one to conserve yarn and also make the i-cord bind off look less clunky.
Over the past few months I've noticed a slightly annoying thing - I'm getting pain in the tendons between fingers on my left hand. Sometimes I'll have an ache that will radiate up my first finger and I put the knitting aside for a couple of days, or up the needle size I'm using. The good news is the muscle in my shoulder that has given me problems in the past, seems to be less likely to be dumb in the past few weeks. I think sword might be helping to strengthen it. This makes me very happy, knowing it won't be giving me as much trouble.
My knees do complain a little bit from time to time, because for some reason it's hard for me to remember to bend my knees - I guess that goes with the shoulders and elbows problem. I do know that if I mess up technique and don't watch my elbows, I may end up hurting them.
I'm trying hard to pay attention to those things without over thinking it. It is so easy to over think. We went to the cutting class, at the dojo, a couple of weeks ago and watched those that had been practicing sword for a while do live cuts. It was fascinating, but a few of the students messed up, because they were caught over thinking their movements. Each andy every person there taught me something in their motions. I watch E as he does his kata and it looks so fluid and amazing, but I have to remember that he's had years of practice. I feel clunky and somewhat wobbly, and every so very often, I get it right and then screw it all up again when I do the next one.
I'm getting in more sword classes than aikido. I'm not really complaining about this, as sword makes me aware of my balance/center and that feels really good. I'm learning how to center myself, which I'm noticing makes me a lot less wobbly. This is good, because my equilibrium isn't the best, so balance has always been an issue.
Since I've gone to a few classes and practice here at home (not as often as I should, I admit, another thing I need to work on), I've noticed a few other things. I have to teach myself to relax my shoulders and keep my elbows in. I don't know why my elbows want to stick out and I want to hunch my shoulders. Then I have to learn to flow more with the sword. I need to learn how to extend my arms without over reaching. I need to learn to shuffle better, but that's coming more easily. I find myself working more on my footwork than anything else. I practice that at random times in the house. I haven't done it much while in public, but I suspect that will change with time.
On the knitting front, I've been avoiding things I shouldn't be and doing other things. I completed a 198 yards of heaven shawl - made of out of Caron Spa and it was closer to 300 yards. It knit up fast, but came out a bit smaller than I had wanted, but is fantastically soft.
When I finished that I was agonizing over what I would do next. I found a shawl that I wanted to do on Ravelry and bought the pattern, then realized that I could not find my 5's. Irritated, I realized I would have to wait until next payday to get a set. I decided to make a knit picks order, but didn't want to not doing anything in the time that I need to wait to make the order, so I looked at shawls I could make with my stash and current needles. I found another shawl that I wanted to do, that also needed 5's. Finally I looked at a pattern that I had decided a couple years ago I wasn't skilled enough to do.
Haruni scared me when I first saw it. It was a lot of lace and a strange cast off. I decided, because I didn't like how the pattern looked, that I would not be doing it. Well, I looked at it again at the end of April and decided it was time to do it. I cast it on, size 4's and Malabrigo Caribeano sock yarn. I also used some blue 6/0 beads on the leaves. I studied this pattern. I went through a bunch of other people's projects, looking at what they did, what they had in their project notes, their suggestions, opinions. I went back a couple of times and looked over a few again, when deciding where I wanted to put the beads. I decided when I did bead it that trying to put the beads on the right side row was royally messing up my tension, so after two rows of beads, I started beading on the wrong side before I purled the stitch. This worked a lot better, my tension was no longer suffering. I'm almost at the end, where I'm still not certain if I'm going to do the crochet bind off or the knitting bind off. If I do the knit, I'm going to drop my needle size down to a one to conserve yarn and also make the i-cord bind off look less clunky.
Over the past few months I've noticed a slightly annoying thing - I'm getting pain in the tendons between fingers on my left hand. Sometimes I'll have an ache that will radiate up my first finger and I put the knitting aside for a couple of days, or up the needle size I'm using. The good news is the muscle in my shoulder that has given me problems in the past, seems to be less likely to be dumb in the past few weeks. I think sword might be helping to strengthen it. This makes me very happy, knowing it won't be giving me as much trouble.
My knees do complain a little bit from time to time, because for some reason it's hard for me to remember to bend my knees - I guess that goes with the shoulders and elbows problem. I do know that if I mess up technique and don't watch my elbows, I may end up hurting them.
I'm trying hard to pay attention to those things without over thinking it. It is so easy to over think. We went to the cutting class, at the dojo, a couple of weeks ago and watched those that had been practicing sword for a while do live cuts. It was fascinating, but a few of the students messed up, because they were caught over thinking their movements. Each andy every person there taught me something in their motions. I watch E as he does his kata and it looks so fluid and amazing, but I have to remember that he's had years of practice. I feel clunky and somewhat wobbly, and every so very often, I get it right and then screw it all up again when I do the next one.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Runs with scissors, walks with bokken
I really should be writing here more, but I've learned that taking up a new martial art (new, ha, I mean starting) is like learning to walk. I feel very much like a child trying to get my limbs to move in the right direction. The fun part is trying to get them all to move in the right direction at the same time - and often it feels like there is a lot to keep track of. My arms go one way, my feet go another.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to lunge with both feet? I know that both feet move independently, but when you see a seasoned person do it, it looks like magic. It seems as though both feet move at the same time and I want so badly to do that, but I fear falling over, in the most undignified way!
I've gotten slightly better at keeping the sharp part of my "sword" pointing in the right direction. At least I know what end the hilt is.
I remember knitting being somewhat trying in the beginning. I wanted to jump right in and make arm warmers and the Doctor Who scarf. I made the arm warmers and I still have the yarn for said scarf. I remember yarn overs being terrifying, but now I do them with ease. I suppose sword will be like that too. I'll create bad habits of my own, that will one day look to someone else like a feat of magic.
I learned that I am, in fact, short enough to practice sword in the house. This makes me happy, as it is pollen season here in the Bay Area, and my East Coast allergies have yet to acclimate (who am I kidding, spring is always going to be "fun"). The cat is a bit dubious of me shuffling about the living room swinging my bokken about. At least I don't think I look like a mad woman. I managed to stretch, do 18 crunches (this is a testament to what sword is doing for me, before I could do barely ten on a whim), and practiced one cut, the lunges, and sheathing and unsheathing my "sword".
Our last lesson was Friday. We had a different sensei that night and the most awesome Lillian to instruct us. Lillian is made of steel, but has the softest, sweetest voice. She is the type of older woman that would make me feel horrible to disappoint. Our sensei for the night took the time to work with me on the very basics - mostly the magical feet thing. I also need to work on how I hold my sword.
E makes the whole damn thing look easy. I have to remember that I need to break these things down to their most basic parts, so I can learn to do them correctly. I can do the first kata pretty well, now that I've got the positioning of the blade right. I need to get used to the cuts, and the draws, even though they really only have me working on a couple. Practice those, drill them, make them movements, not thought. I think way too much and I screw up when I think too hard. Sometimes I have to just take a deep breath, and as I let it out, make the movement. The whole "keep it simple, stupid" comes to mind. I've always had a hard time keeping it simple.
Another interesting little thing that came from all of this was E and I talking about balance. We sat on the floor to do some stretches and he had me sit Indian style and then took his hands and forced my back straight. I was both horrified and amused at what he did. It felt so weird. I've been slouching so much, that sitting correctly not only feels strange, but kind of hurts. And I've got this weird exo-skeleton of fat on my stomach that feels vaguely like a corset. Did you know that when you start becoming more active that your fat moves? I wouldn't necessarily say it is going away, but it has definitely shifted and has caused me a great deal of amusement as I point out these little changes that I'm noticing to E.
As for the mind, I think this is helping me. The movement gives me energy and focus. The dojo gives me a sense of community that I've been missing since leaving church almost 14 years ago. The fact that I don't know what the hell I'm doing gives me humility, awe in those that do know what they are doing, and eagerness to learn more. I know I have to take it slow, in order to become the person with the abilities that I want to be, and I think I'm okay with that.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to lunge with both feet? I know that both feet move independently, but when you see a seasoned person do it, it looks like magic. It seems as though both feet move at the same time and I want so badly to do that, but I fear falling over, in the most undignified way!
I've gotten slightly better at keeping the sharp part of my "sword" pointing in the right direction. At least I know what end the hilt is.
I remember knitting being somewhat trying in the beginning. I wanted to jump right in and make arm warmers and the Doctor Who scarf. I made the arm warmers and I still have the yarn for said scarf. I remember yarn overs being terrifying, but now I do them with ease. I suppose sword will be like that too. I'll create bad habits of my own, that will one day look to someone else like a feat of magic.
I learned that I am, in fact, short enough to practice sword in the house. This makes me happy, as it is pollen season here in the Bay Area, and my East Coast allergies have yet to acclimate (who am I kidding, spring is always going to be "fun"). The cat is a bit dubious of me shuffling about the living room swinging my bokken about. At least I don't think I look like a mad woman. I managed to stretch, do 18 crunches (this is a testament to what sword is doing for me, before I could do barely ten on a whim), and practiced one cut, the lunges, and sheathing and unsheathing my "sword".
Our last lesson was Friday. We had a different sensei that night and the most awesome Lillian to instruct us. Lillian is made of steel, but has the softest, sweetest voice. She is the type of older woman that would make me feel horrible to disappoint. Our sensei for the night took the time to work with me on the very basics - mostly the magical feet thing. I also need to work on how I hold my sword.
E makes the whole damn thing look easy. I have to remember that I need to break these things down to their most basic parts, so I can learn to do them correctly. I can do the first kata pretty well, now that I've got the positioning of the blade right. I need to get used to the cuts, and the draws, even though they really only have me working on a couple. Practice those, drill them, make them movements, not thought. I think way too much and I screw up when I think too hard. Sometimes I have to just take a deep breath, and as I let it out, make the movement. The whole "keep it simple, stupid" comes to mind. I've always had a hard time keeping it simple.
Another interesting little thing that came from all of this was E and I talking about balance. We sat on the floor to do some stretches and he had me sit Indian style and then took his hands and forced my back straight. I was both horrified and amused at what he did. It felt so weird. I've been slouching so much, that sitting correctly not only feels strange, but kind of hurts. And I've got this weird exo-skeleton of fat on my stomach that feels vaguely like a corset. Did you know that when you start becoming more active that your fat moves? I wouldn't necessarily say it is going away, but it has definitely shifted and has caused me a great deal of amusement as I point out these little changes that I'm noticing to E.
As for the mind, I think this is helping me. The movement gives me energy and focus. The dojo gives me a sense of community that I've been missing since leaving church almost 14 years ago. The fact that I don't know what the hell I'm doing gives me humility, awe in those that do know what they are doing, and eagerness to learn more. I know I have to take it slow, in order to become the person with the abilities that I want to be, and I think I'm okay with that.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
The Journey begins
This part of the journey began in October, when we moved from PA to the Bay Area in CA. Changing coasts has been an eye opening experience and brought some changes to my life.
My experience with knitting started numerous years ago, but only within the past year can I say I really began to fall in love with it. It's wonderful to have an art, something that you can show other people and say, "I did this." Having the ability to make something delicate and intricate or something durable and warm, makes me very happy. I've completed socks, shawls, scarves, hats, and arm warmers. I have plans to do much more, and have something constantly on the needles, and plenty of stashed yarn for a moments weakness to start yet another project.
But onto the newest part of my journey, which started a couple of weeks ago at a dojo in Oakland.
My boyfriend's coworker had been telling E (my boyfriend) about the dojo he goes to. He had invited us awhile back, but recently started urging E to go more adamantly. I said I'd happily go to watch. I sat to watch the end of an aikido class. The next class was japanese sword technique. I watched this class as well; I was left in awe at the sight of an older woman with her sword. . Her movement was true love to art of the sword and I became enamored.
I decided I wanted to see at least one more class of each. We ended up going the next Friday night and I watched my boyfriend on the mats with intrigue. There were three classes that night, that I watched. I decided pretty quickly that I wasn't interested in Jujutsu (or Jiujitsu) - at least not at the moment. Things could change in the future.
Last Saturday arrived and we went to the morning aikido class. I watched again, and pondered what to do. I had seen two sword classes, should I try? The older woman walks into the dojo and gets changed and comes out and sits on the bench next to me. In the sweetest, even voice that I've ever heard she asked how I was, and if I was going to join. I told her I was nervous and I didn't have a gi. She immediately smiled and took me back to pick a loaner. She told me to try it on, and if I wanted I could take it home to wash and join whenever. I went out to join the class.
Sword is interesting. Beside the fact that I can't figure out which side is the sharp side of the bokken, I get the cuts pretty well. The shuffle is still confusing, but I've never done this before and need to learn. We left the class an hour later, and I was bubbling over with glee. I wasn't the only one, as my boyfriend has been practicing martial arts for many years now, and it's now a shared interest.
I'll admit, I ached on Sunday. My everything felt like a bunch of small children with nerf bats had beat me for an hour. It was fantastic.
Many times during the week, we took the time to go through the practices and he showed me a few basic aikido moves. We joked that aikido is like water bending (AKA Avatar: The Last Air Bender and not the blasted movie).
Last night, E asked me if I was going to go this morning to the dojo with him. I said yes.
I woke up grumbly. I'm not a morning person of any sort and we needed to get going early in order to get there in time for the class. We grabbed coffee and were on our way.
I joined the aikido class today. It's baffling, getting used to the movements and how to do joint locks, but at the same time it is fascinating and empowering. I'm apparently flexible, which amuses me. My knees are complaining now, because of learning to move in a way that I don't normally move.
Sword, is a joy and completely alien. I really need to figure out my bokken, or I'm going have more embarrassing moments of being told from across the dojo that my sword was upside down (I laughed and corrected myself). I learned lunges, and practiced the basic cuts. Now I need to practice, practice, practice.
Having a moment of deep thought here: I noticed one thing that would have changed something in my life growing up. Had the people at the church I went to treated each other how the members of the class at the dojo treated each other, it would have been a much more meaningful experience. In the dojo you have to trust the other students and the sensei to have your well being in mind. In turn, you have to be mindful of their well being. We work together to learn, and that lacked not only in my church experience, but in my private high school experience, too. It left me looking for something more and I think I may have found it.
I look forward to the differences I notice in the weeks and months to come. This journal is my journey down that road. Welcome.
My experience with knitting started numerous years ago, but only within the past year can I say I really began to fall in love with it. It's wonderful to have an art, something that you can show other people and say, "I did this." Having the ability to make something delicate and intricate or something durable and warm, makes me very happy. I've completed socks, shawls, scarves, hats, and arm warmers. I have plans to do much more, and have something constantly on the needles, and plenty of stashed yarn for a moments weakness to start yet another project.
But onto the newest part of my journey, which started a couple of weeks ago at a dojo in Oakland.
My boyfriend's coworker had been telling E (my boyfriend) about the dojo he goes to. He had invited us awhile back, but recently started urging E to go more adamantly. I said I'd happily go to watch. I sat to watch the end of an aikido class. The next class was japanese sword technique. I watched this class as well; I was left in awe at the sight of an older woman with her sword. . Her movement was true love to art of the sword and I became enamored.
I decided I wanted to see at least one more class of each. We ended up going the next Friday night and I watched my boyfriend on the mats with intrigue. There were three classes that night, that I watched. I decided pretty quickly that I wasn't interested in Jujutsu (or Jiujitsu) - at least not at the moment. Things could change in the future.
Last Saturday arrived and we went to the morning aikido class. I watched again, and pondered what to do. I had seen two sword classes, should I try? The older woman walks into the dojo and gets changed and comes out and sits on the bench next to me. In the sweetest, even voice that I've ever heard she asked how I was, and if I was going to join. I told her I was nervous and I didn't have a gi. She immediately smiled and took me back to pick a loaner. She told me to try it on, and if I wanted I could take it home to wash and join whenever. I went out to join the class.
Sword is interesting. Beside the fact that I can't figure out which side is the sharp side of the bokken, I get the cuts pretty well. The shuffle is still confusing, but I've never done this before and need to learn. We left the class an hour later, and I was bubbling over with glee. I wasn't the only one, as my boyfriend has been practicing martial arts for many years now, and it's now a shared interest.
I'll admit, I ached on Sunday. My everything felt like a bunch of small children with nerf bats had beat me for an hour. It was fantastic.
Many times during the week, we took the time to go through the practices and he showed me a few basic aikido moves. We joked that aikido is like water bending (AKA Avatar: The Last Air Bender and not the blasted movie).
Last night, E asked me if I was going to go this morning to the dojo with him. I said yes.
I woke up grumbly. I'm not a morning person of any sort and we needed to get going early in order to get there in time for the class. We grabbed coffee and were on our way.
I joined the aikido class today. It's baffling, getting used to the movements and how to do joint locks, but at the same time it is fascinating and empowering. I'm apparently flexible, which amuses me. My knees are complaining now, because of learning to move in a way that I don't normally move.
Sword, is a joy and completely alien. I really need to figure out my bokken, or I'm going have more embarrassing moments of being told from across the dojo that my sword was upside down (I laughed and corrected myself). I learned lunges, and practiced the basic cuts. Now I need to practice, practice, practice.
Having a moment of deep thought here: I noticed one thing that would have changed something in my life growing up. Had the people at the church I went to treated each other how the members of the class at the dojo treated each other, it would have been a much more meaningful experience. In the dojo you have to trust the other students and the sensei to have your well being in mind. In turn, you have to be mindful of their well being. We work together to learn, and that lacked not only in my church experience, but in my private high school experience, too. It left me looking for something more and I think I may have found it.
I look forward to the differences I notice in the weeks and months to come. This journal is my journey down that road. Welcome.
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